My last post was in April of last year. So much has happened in that time, and I feel guilty for not updating in so long for those of you the were following my journey.
I am sorry.
The last year has been a whirl-wind of change and changing for me. I had to take a really hard look at where I was, and WHO I was inside.
I think that I had just reached a burnout point from my life in general, and my life with kids. I decided that I didn’t want/need to continue with fostering and not be able to give my all to the kids who needed me.
I felt that my best course of action was to drop out of life, and hide behind my computer screen quietly selling products on eBay and Amazon. Living my life with much less responsibility of caring for others.
The year of 2016 passed, and as it turned out, life had it’s way of gently (and some days not so gently) showing me that hiding behind a computer screen and avoiding everything is not the person I am here to become.
The more I seemed to work towards a life of seclusion, the more I was being nudged/lead back into a life of service.
Here are some pics of my journey and transformation. I am learning to embrace the person that I am inside, and I am really looking forward to continuing the journey.
Looking back at my blog it was in the beginning of 2016 where I announced I was taking a year away from fostering to recharge, get healthy, and discover “What do I want to be when THEY (the kids) are all grown and gone?”
My goals at that time were:
- My Health. As many of you know, back in August I adopted a new way of eating and have so far lost 72 pounds. I do have a long way before I reach the state of health that I am looking to achieve, but it feels really good to be working on it.
- My Business. I have been tinkering online for 10 years. It has been only in the last couple years that I have become serious about creating a generous income from the comfort of my home, on my terms. Really diving in with both feet to expand my business and make it a true success.
- Finding what it is that excites me and that I can become passionate about.
- Finding out how I can best be of service to the community of empty nesters who are likely in the exact same positions as me.
- My family and friends. Keeping strong relationships with family and friends as well as meeting new friends and work colleagues.
And where I sit today:
- I feel like I am in the best health that I have been in all my adult life. I have lost a total of now between 155-160 pounds (it fluctuates), I am no longer categorized as diabetic, and I am completely off my high blood pressure medication.
- I am still growing and changing as far as “business” goes (more to come on that). I realized late in 2016 that the business I did DIVE into was not the business that I truly enjoyed.
- Finding out what excites me is always going to be growing and changing – My main passion and love right now is being a Grandma to my grandson and new littles.
- Empty Nesting seems to be a FAIL right now. Although I am not going to call it failure, I am calling this past year feedback. Turns out my nest didn’t like being empty, and I didn’t like it being empty.
- As for family and friends. Those bonds and relationships have only grown stronger. I have been throwing myself back into life, meeting new people, getting involved and I am actually really enjoying it!
A few things that I have discovered along the way:
- I am a caregiver and nurturer by nature. Part of me was missing having the ‘littles’ around. Knowing that, starting in January of this year I have opened my home back up to kids in care that need a good and loving home. The difference this time is that I have younger kids. So far it’s been a LOT of fun re-inventing my self as a Gramma!
- The next thing that I discovered was back in 2015 I felt so very unhealthy, fat and burnt out that I could not imagine carrying on with the stress of high needs kids and political BS that comes with fostering. I was really TIRED, and thought “retiring” was the best option.
- Turns out – that if a gal loses 155 pounds, she feels a lot better, has a lot more energy, and can manage much more. That said, I was able to really jump back into life not retire from it. With the kids I have now I can actually get down on the floor and PLAY!! That is an awesome stress relief right there!
- One thing that I know now, is that life is not about hiding away from the world, it is facing it head on with expectancy and determination. It’s about continuing to grow, share, learn, and serve others. It’s about being the person that you feel you are in your heart.
Looking forward to chatting with you more soon.